So you want to be a writer.
Here's my advice.
If you want to know about my writing process, it's here.
1. Read.
And no, I don't mean spending your one wild and precious life reading books about writing.
While there are many good books on craft, you can waste a lot of time reading about how to write instead of actually writing.
To quote Admiral Ackbar: It's a trap.
Just read lots of good books, in and out of your intended genre.
Read classics.
Read contemporary fiction.
Read nonfiction.
Read all over the place.
Be promiscuous and reckless in your reading.
While there are many good books on craft, you can waste a lot of time reading about how to write instead of actually writing.
To quote Admiral Ackbar: It's a trap.
Just read lots of good books, in and out of your intended genre.
Read classics.
Read contemporary fiction.
Read nonfiction.
Read all over the place.
Be promiscuous and reckless in your reading.
2. Write.
If you don't write, you're not a writer.
A writer is someone who writes. It's that simple. And that hard.
Find good tools for the job.
A writer is someone who writes. It's that simple. And that hard.
Find good tools for the job.
- Find a pen you love. Consider writing long-hand or keeping a journal. I write everything in an unlined sketchbook like this one and then I edit as I type it into my computer.
- Use Scrivener. Please, for the love of all that is good and holy, do not use Microsoft Word or Google Docs to write a book. A novel is a Phillips-head screw. Word or Docs are raggedy, old flat-head screwdrivers. Sure, you could use them, but you'll probably draw blood. Scrivener is a lovely Phillips-head screwdriver with a unicorn sticker on the handle. Use it.
3. Gather a team.
Writing is both dreadfully lonely AND a team sport.
You'll need:
You'll need:
- Readers. It doesn't matter how amazingly talented you are, you need people to read and critique your work.
- Look for intelligent, trustworthy, story-loving people who will offer constructive criticism. Try to make them follow the "What if you tried..." rule. Whenever they say "This isn't working," they must add, "What if you tried..."
- Other Artists. This is your pit crew. Family is good. Friends are good. But only other artists - novelists, screenwriters, painters, puppet-makers, furniture makers, musicians, etc. can fully commiserate with your artistic plight. I was extraordinarily lucky to have an amazing critique group for my first decade of writing. Without them, there's no way I'd have gotten far. So, gather yourself a group of artists. Ask them to be a team who will:
- help each other set goals,
- provide encouragement,
- keep each other accountable for doing the work,
- support each other through inevitable difficulties, and
- celebrate each others' victories.
- Not optional: be kind, be humble, and do nice things for your team. You'll definitely be a pain in the ass sometimes. Your team is working hard for you. Buy them a drink or bake them a cake every once in a while.
4. Be totally, definitively sure you NEED to be published.
There is a universe of difference between writing for yourself and writing for publication.
There is a galaxy of difference between self-publishing and the world of agents and professional, traditional publishers.
Frankly, I don't recommend writing as a profession. It's vanishingly difficult to get published, to say nothing of actually making a living.
If you can write for your own edification or be happy with self-publishing, do that. I don't know much about self-publishing so I am not the person to give you pointers.
If you can do anything else to make a living, anything other than being a writer, do the other thing.
You really sure you want all that?
You do? Okay. Right, then. Onward.
There is a galaxy of difference between self-publishing and the world of agents and professional, traditional publishers.
Frankly, I don't recommend writing as a profession. It's vanishingly difficult to get published, to say nothing of actually making a living.
If you can write for your own edification or be happy with self-publishing, do that. I don't know much about self-publishing so I am not the person to give you pointers.
If you can do anything else to make a living, anything other than being a writer, do the other thing.
- THE GOOD of being a writer:
- Your work clothes are sweatshirts and old jeans.
- Maybe your lifelong dream of being a published author will come true.
- You may get emails from readers who love your book.
- You might earn (small amounts of) real, actual dollars from your writing.
- You'll probably meet other authors.
- You'll see your book in the wild at a bookstore or library.
- Maybe you won't feel quite so self-delusional when you tell people you are a writer.
- THE BAD:
- You will do more editing than you can possibly imagine yet you will still find a typo in your book.
- You will make much less money than you thought you would.
- Being a writer is nothing like they make it seem in the movies.
- You will have bookstore events where exactly three people show up: your mom, your bestie, and the bookstore owner.
- You'll spend a bananas amount of time on publicity including questionably helpful social media and unquestionably tedious website maintenance.
- THE UGLY:
- Rejections.
- Bad reviews. I don't read mine. I close my eyes and make my husband read them and then let him lie to me.
- If you are like the vaaaaaast majority of writers, your writing income will fall well below the federal poverty level. I am not joking even a little bit.
- Your love of bookstores and libraries and all that is good and bookish will spiral. You will love/hate ALL of it. You walk into what was once your favorite bookstore and you spiral. Maybe they don't carry all your books, or they do, but they are waaay down the shelf. And who do you have to kiss to get your book in The New York Review of Books, anyway?
- Rejections.
You really sure you want all that?
You do? Okay. Right, then. Onward.
5. Rejection is inevitable no matter how good a writer you are.
After I wrote (and rewrote) my first novel, it took me a full year to get an agent, and four years after that to get a book deal. I wrote my second novel while collecting rejections for my first. It was worth the wait: I love my editor and publisher. But the wait? Brutal. Four years of getting my hopes up every time I checked my mailbox or my email. Four years of being disappointed every time I checked my mailbox or email.
Do you have the stamina for that?
In those years, people would ask my young son what his mommy did for a living. He would blink his Bambi eyes and answer, with all the earnestness of a big-hearted three-year-old, "My mommy gets rejection letters."
I know. You chortled and you thought, That's not going to be me. I'm more talented than you are.
Awesome. Maybe work on your humility.
Even if, on your very first try, you get an agent and a seven-figure book deal and a sweet movie option, you will still get rejected. You might get dropped by your publisher. Critics might pan the movie. Maybe bookstores don't keep your book in stock. Or a writer with your exact same idea stays on the New York Times Best Seller list for a year longer than you do.
It's gonna happen. It is an inevitability.
And so I give you my method for surviving rejection.
Do you have the stamina for that?
In those years, people would ask my young son what his mommy did for a living. He would blink his Bambi eyes and answer, with all the earnestness of a big-hearted three-year-old, "My mommy gets rejection letters."
I know. You chortled and you thought, That's not going to be me. I'm more talented than you are.
Awesome. Maybe work on your humility.
Even if, on your very first try, you get an agent and a seven-figure book deal and a sweet movie option, you will still get rejected. You might get dropped by your publisher. Critics might pan the movie. Maybe bookstores don't keep your book in stock. Or a writer with your exact same idea stays on the New York Times Best Seller list for a year longer than you do.
It's gonna happen. It is an inevitability.
And so I give you my method for surviving rejection.
- Listen only to the people who care about you and want what's best for you. They are the sole providers of trustworthy criticism. Take their criticism and suggestions to heart. Ignore the rest. If your eyes accidentally trip over a particularly nasty rejection letter or bad review, remind yourself: Haters gonna hate.
- Allow yourself 24 hours per rejection to wallow in a mire of self-pity. Remember, F. Scott Fitzgerald wallpapered his room with rejection letters. It's not a style I would pin to my Style and Design Pinterest board, but it worked for him. My wallowing usually includes sobbing in Snoopy fashion while washing down cookie dough with wine from a box. Find what works for you. You get 24 hours. Carpe Diem.
- You do not have to have a thick skin. You just have to keep going. You can be sensitive. You can cry every time you get a rejection. But after 24 hours you must move the f*ck on.
- Choose a theme song. Play it loud and often. Punch-dance to it. Watch the warehouse scene from Footloose for inspiration.
- Celebrate victories big and small. You signed up for a writing class? Cupcake! You finished your chapter? Cupcake! The rejection letter was personal instead of a form letter? Cupcake! You got an agent? Cake! That tiny article you wrote is being published online? Cupcake when it's accepted. Cupcake when you turn in your edits. Cake when it gets published.
- If you get rejection after rejection and you still feel compelled to write, congratulations. You’re a writer. (Cake!)
Punch-Dancing Hall of Fame. (photo: IMDB)
6. Back it up.
Story time.
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...
... an author lost three-quarters of a novel (which was freaking fantastic, by the way) AND the memoir from her year in Australia because her MacBook crashed.
RIP hard drive. RIP novel. RIP memoir.
Did this author know she should have been backing up? Of course she did. But she had moved hemispheres, and houses, and was traveling a lot, and just hadn't remembered to plug in an external hard drive. Blah blah excuse excuse.
This, ahem, anonymous writer does not want others to experience her hellish nightmare.
Writing is torturous enough. Losing your work is rubbing lemon juice into your paper cuts.
And so you must back up your work.
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...
... an author lost three-quarters of a novel (which was freaking fantastic, by the way) AND the memoir from her year in Australia because her MacBook crashed.
RIP hard drive. RIP novel. RIP memoir.
Did this author know she should have been backing up? Of course she did. But she had moved hemispheres, and houses, and was traveling a lot, and just hadn't remembered to plug in an external hard drive. Blah blah excuse excuse.
This, ahem, anonymous writer does not want others to experience her hellish nightmare.
Writing is torturous enough. Losing your work is rubbing lemon juice into your paper cuts.
And so you must back up your work.
- Back up to the cloud. Technology is always changing, but I advise you to sign up for a free Dropbox or Google Drive account.
- Set your computer to save your writing automatically. If your back-up isn't automatic, it does not count. You will get in the zone and you will forget.
- You can ask Scrivener to automatically back-up to Dropbox or Google Drive. Here's a video of how to do it - scroll down to "Folder Sync."
- In addition, a re-bootable external hard drive isn't a bad idea, if you remember to back up and if you keep it in a secure, fire-and-flood-proof box. Those are too many ifs.
- Bonus: Name your external hard drive Dat Ass, so you can always back 'Dat Ass' up.
7. Be a decent human.
Living your life as a miserable, bitter, misunderstood writing genius may seem romantic and artsy, but nope. It's just miserable.
You can be a good writer and be a good human and be happy. But it takes work. You must be intentional about it.
Be kind to your people. Be good to yourself. Figure out ways to make this world better for other living things. Balance your work with lots of play.
If you are not happy, find a way to become so. Get help. Reach out. There is no reward for needless suffering.
Then, from your balanced, healthy platform, take care and take risks.
A full and interesting life makes for full and interesting stories.
No, fiction isn’t autobiography. But you do need to know something about love, risk, and human nature in order to write things worth reading.
Be brave enough to enjoy your life.
You can be a good writer and be a good human and be happy. But it takes work. You must be intentional about it.
Be kind to your people. Be good to yourself. Figure out ways to make this world better for other living things. Balance your work with lots of play.
If you are not happy, find a way to become so. Get help. Reach out. There is no reward for needless suffering.
Then, from your balanced, healthy platform, take care and take risks.
A full and interesting life makes for full and interesting stories.
No, fiction isn’t autobiography. But you do need to know something about love, risk, and human nature in order to write things worth reading.
Be brave enough to enjoy your life.
Good luck. Keep writing.
And may the Force be with you.
And may the Force be with you.